Moonoppai’s Weblog

Mahalo… I am going to be a doctor. I have decided on this along time ago but but something always kept me back. I think it was a lack of confidence in my ability to do things. It is really true what they say… with confidence there are no walls that can not be overtake or any obstacles that stand in your way. Don’t get me wrong do not mistake confidence for arrogance or cockiness. Those are two traits that will ultimately lead to one’s demise, mentally and physically. What I am referring to is the confidence to always moving forward without any hinderances or hindering other people. To be an individual in this world of couples and pairs. We need to have relationships with others to communicate and to progress farther in this world, but what we do not need is to lose oneself to depedency. Those people, in my opinion, are those who lack the confidence to make something out of themselves in this world. To fall into the cracks of the common people and become people with lost dreams and goals. As much as I would love to find someone, an equal, I have failed to find a person that can catch up to my standards, my lifestyle, my strength as an individual. I hate to sound egotisitcal or arrogant myself…in fact i am sure i sound like a complete ass by saying so. But no one in my life has able to match who I am and what I choose to accomplish with or without others…Because even though no man is an island, it doesn’t mean that they can’t become one. hello and good night

Gutentag, mein avid readers.. I do apologize I have been dreadfully busy the last copy of weeks so i haven’t been able to write on my blog. I know that your appetites crave for more bitching and moaning sessions or things that make you go hmmmm, but I promise I will be back after finals in full force or once I have enough money to buy a laptop so I can write on the GOOOOO. Thank you for your dedication and your patience. Hello and GOOD morning.

Anyohaseyo everyone, I am back and this entry is another life lesson from my many, many pages from my book of experience. Granted I have only lived on this Earth for 23 years and the Earth is only about a couple of million even if that years old. It is about flying to high, not literally of course. Everyone knows you can drug up to be higher than a F*** kite sometimes. No I mean aiming higher than you can imagine. It is like the story of Icarus, the boy who flew too close to the sun. He ended up falling, and falling hard, not a euphism. The reason why I bring up such a idea is this… I just saw a friend, a good friend of mine who looked like nothing could bother them, no bad news could phase them, that nothing in the world could make that smile on their face turn upside down. It was because my dear friends…she was in love. I told and I wrote of love to people and how it makes us feel; makes us do some irrational things, but as cliche as it is “love is caring and love is blind.” For the first time in a long time I was truely happy for her, but that is what worries me. You see, even in light of happiness I still worry unlike other people who keep truckin on like a normal day. I worry for people that have hopes and dreams, because I saw someone I deeply care about lose everything in an instance. In a snap of a finger, his world was destoryed like the feeling you get when you play the game jinga, when the tower shakes and falls, you close your eyes and yell at the top of your lungs….OH NO.

I am not saying that life is impossible to aim high; no no. I am not saying that we are all doomed for failure…NO NO if you are thinking that you have missed my point. My point of this ramble, my point of my consistent complaining and bitching about the world is to give inspiration to others to find the good in it. I told people that love is great, love is good, but don’t rush it. Don’t prematurely fall into it. This is what I mean… I have seen too many bodies floating in the sea of failure, of loss to keep count. I have seen too many people be on cloud nine one minute, then fall into the deepest void of darkness. The reason for that is…because they were chasing a dream, chasing an emotion, chasing a empty box they wanted to fill and the only they could fill it is with someone else. People are fragile things, but people’s minds are even more delicate. Imagine, you all with bf and gf if that person died, or left without a word, and you were a lone…would you have the strength to pick yourself and try again? would you have the determination and strive to move forward? I don’t and I’ve been truely alone for the longest time…but I am changing that…I am gritting my teeth and clenching my fists beating them against the Earth to become what I ultimately was afraid of becoming…a fighter. Anyways enough of this emo shiiittttt. Just some food for thought…..a person can’t only be physcially strong to survive….Hello and Good night..

Konnichiwa everyone, Moon is back from a little vacation from mental anguish and strive. He will be writing more of his blogs once again in the next coming weeks. So fans of my writing which is probably a populus of…… a couple of people I thank you for all your support. Take care and Hello and goodmorning to you all.

I am not going to write any more logs for awhile. Thanks you everyone, but I think I need a break from everything… be back before you know it..

Halo, everyone. Some morning knowledge for you all. It amazes me sometimes how delicate somethings are in this world. Flowers, glass, and most importantly people. My girl has been sick for a couple of days thanks to yours truly so to make it up to her and make it so she doesn’t keep on guilt tripping the shit out of me, I went over there last night to take care of her.  She opened the door with a sniffle in her voice and looking like a day old milk still in its cup. I commented on that and we punched me playfully in the arm as she let me in. She was covered in a blanket from head to toe, sniffling all the way back to her room. Lethargically she plopped onto the bed and curled up into a ball as I followed her into the room. I fell onto the bed next to her and she snailed her way over to my legs. Placing her congested head on my legs she started to sniff me loudly and said to me, man you smell like crap. I’ve been out all day and the rain didn’t make it anybetter, so she suggested we take a bath. “Together?” , “Why not?”, I called her a perv and she made a joke like she was gonna rape my frail boyish body. We laughed hard and decided yea why not? We filled the tub and waited talking about our day and what plans we had for next week whether or not we would have time to meet up.

When the bath was ready we both stripped, laughin to cut the awkwardness down a bit, then turned off the bathroom light and lit some candles. I laid back as she fell between my arms and legs, me feeling the warm of her body and the softness of her skin on mine. Granted she ruined the moment with a series of disgusting coughing and clearing her throat noises. I commented on that too and she punched me again. We sat there enjoying the silence of her tub…hearing nothing but the drops of water from the nozzle. I traced her arm that was outside the tub with my own and rested my chin on her head only to smell the scent of her hair. Surprisingly it had a nice fragrance to it…Her body was tiny compared to mine, so fragile and petite, I felt like I was going to break her if I hugged her too hard, but I wrapped my arms around her as she shifted her weight placing her ear to my chest, I dunno what she heard at that time, but from what I could see from the candle light she was smiling…I found myself smiling as well…. It is the little things in life that make us happy, and even though our time together will be short, I will cherish every moment of it. Hello and good morning to you all and have a good day.

I think I am falling for this girl….

I haven’t fell this hard in what feels like a lifetime…..

She knows all the right words to say……..

Maybe its because she reads so many books…..

She’s probably using lines from Shakespeare or Romance novels….

But I don’t care, because when I look into her blue eyes….

And kiss her soft lips, all those years of trying to find companionship….

of having no one….

seem all worth it….

She walks as if she doesn’t have a care in the world……

The midnight starlight and moon light, touch her skin ever so lightly that if I touched it, it would shatter into millions of pieces.

She looks so beautiful in the night with her short hair tangled in her face as she laughs and spins like a fairy ballerina in the stillness of this night.

She calls for me and I run to her, embracing her warm, covered body and as I do she smiles ever so gently.

She is absolutely amazing…

She takes off her glasses and giggles a little telling me she can only see blur that used to be my face. So I come in closer and ask her if that is better….

She says nothing…but her next actions show me that she thought it was better… I love night walks now and forever.

Hello and good evening ladies and gentlemen. A friend said something to me this evening that not only brought a thought to my mind but also snowballed a towing wave of memories and ideas. “That was over two years ago Moon,” he said as we were taking about past memories and times we had with friends and colleagues. I realized that it’s time to move on. Not only from this little town called Davis, but from everything else. As I stood there talking to my friend, I looked at the long line of bar going patrons and realized, at that age, would I be doing the same thing? trying to be young when i really am not? It is in my hopes that i do not become one of those people. Now I am not saying that I am old. Hell I’m only 23, ripeful age to still go partying and having wild nights till the cows come and all that jazz. But lately I been feeling the urge to slow down. Tonight, all by myself, I strolled through the Davis streets, looking for a quiet place to sit and read my new novels I had just purchased.  And throughout my travels, my steps, I saw something. It wasn’t romance, it wasn’t love, and it wasn’t a chance for sex, it was a companion. Someone that someone can depend on and have fun with without there being hurt feelings, past feelings, or awkwardness. A companion, a person I can turn to and would be always willing to spend time with me, make me laugh, cry and just plain smile. But I digress more on that in a later wriitng.

I want to talk about something thats been on my mind as of late, and it is the idea of running away from your problems. People hate conflict, I do and I know many others that run from their problems by coming to me for advice about them. I am no remedy, no cure-all, no magical herb that makes people forget. No they’re drugs for that if you want to take the cheap way out of reality. Running away from the city you are in because of the people who are there, the memories that it holds. More importantly, abandoning the people who create those memories in a wink of an idea like they would forget who you are if you stop talking to them, like they never existed. Fear is what causes all of this, fear and the inability to move on. I am a person who lives for the past, that is why I have so many pictures, movies, trinkets, coats, clothes. I am the father of all packrats because I cling to memories like a person with a terminal disease clings to life. But I think its about time to pack that stuff up, I think its time to move on and stop living in the past meaning past loves, past deaths, past incidences and most important past regrets. So tomorrow my fellow readers which I am not even sure I have…I am packing all of it up and looking forward towards the future of things. Hello and good morning to you all, tomorrow is a new day.

Haro, my wonderful fans I am back with somewhat of a strange topic to talk…well technically to write about. And yes you’ve guessed it, the topic is sex. With my head cleared of clutter from a nice night run and testosterone coursing through my veins, I can say i think about this topic alot. Not because I am a guy and apparently my penis determines my destiny and my decision making, No it is because I have plenty of friends would sleep around more often than they go to the dentist or change the oil in their car. To them sex is nothing but a tool, an experience to gain pleasure from. Yes sex is great and all, but when it only lasts 30 minutes to 1hr tops that could be equivalent to say, a movie watched with close friends drunk, or a 1/5 of night dancing and hanging out with friends, it could be an hour of hardcore gaming with a person from Minnesota and pwning the motherfucker till he logs off. My point being is sex without love is just meaningless sex… Let me break it down for you. I’ve have sex without love before and I’ve have sex with the intention of telling that person I love them, and you know what is more satisfying? The sex with love. Some might disagree, but let me tell you this, when I bust a nut or she shakes and shivers and it is over in 20 minutes to 30 minutes or sometimes less, what do people that do sex without love do, fuck I went to the kitchen and got something to eat, and went on like I just masturbated inside of a warm patch of skin, its fucking retarded and ridiculous at the same time, yet some of my friends find it fulfilling. Others use sex, I must sadly to say, as a way to make them feel attractive. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had friends that are girls, mostly, that fucked every new person they met just so they could prove that they were attractive enough to get any man. There has to be another word for sad because it is just not cutting it.

Look eceryone I am a college student like most of the people that should be reading this blog, not for younger eyes plz, and I understand that there are points where we get so busy that sex without love is fine and you know thats fine and all. I still do it and some people in my life also do it as well. The point I am trying to make is there is a different between making love with a person and having sex with a person, and in all truth, I am tried of fucking everything with a boob, butt, vagina and face, I am sick of waking up next to a person I have no personal interest in except getting my rocks off. I am sick of people using me as a tool to get over their boyfriends or want a quick lay. What I challenge to the people who read this blog of mine is go out and find someone who you can truely connect with and then you know what you will have the best sex of your life. I did once but then like an idiot I fucked it up. Anyway i think that is enough for now, Hello and goodnight..